Longtime readers will know that I loveso-called “lifestyle” galleries. This is when a company shows you how to enjoy a gaming system in real life by making a bunch of people dress likederping douchebagswhile striking forced, insincere poses. Because real life looks like that.

The PlayStation Vita has gotten its own selection of images, full of tight denim jackets and glazed, grinning expressions. Interestingly, there are no women in these galleries, indicating that the Vita is just for men. Smirking, airbrushed men in bright yellow hoodies and red jeans. F*cking pricks.

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As usual, I have taken to naming them in order of appearance. Janson “I Have A Guitar” Smarmy, Retardo Crotchrot, and Sniffing Peabody. Aren’t they a wacky bunch?

A battle scene in Battlefield 6 Open Beta

capcom evo moment 37

GigabyteMon

A snap of the upcoming MESA update in PEAK

Naked Snake sneaking around in MGS Delta.

Battlefield 6 aiming RPG at a helicopter

BO7 key art

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Milla Jovovich portraying Alice in Resident Evil 2002, wearing a red dress and holding a gun in her hand.